Finding My Way Home
by TheySayItsCrazy
Summary: Ch. 5 up! DEADLIEST CATCH. I still had no idea what the hell I was doing in Alaska. All I knew was that I had needed a change from...everything really, and Dutch Harbor and Aunt Mae had offered that change. Josh Harris/OFC
1. Chapter 1

**Hello everyone!! It has been a LONG time since I've ever writen a fanfic, but this idea wouldn't leave me head so I had to write it out, and Deadliest Catch is quickly becoming one of my favorite shows ever. I never really liked reality based television. But there is something just bad ass about these men. :-)**

**So I bring you this story... Please review. I am a bit of a grammar freak, but do tend to overlook a lot. Let me know if you see something I missed. **

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Chapter 1.

Dutch Harbor, Alaska, located on Unalaska Island. Population 4,283, during the off season; during Crab season though, there could be thousands more. Dutch Harbor would be packed to the brim with ships and captains alike; deckhands and greenhorns, engineers and deck bosses.

Luckily for me though, the harbor was pretty quiet that summer night. It was a very good thing for my mind at that moment, because I still had no idea what the hell I was doing in Alaska. All I knew was that I had needed a change from...everything really, and Dutch Harbor offered that change.

The taxi ride over from the Airport had been too short in my mind. Having the driver drop me off near the docks, probably wasn't the safest thing for a girl to do at night, but my mind had been swimming ever since I had heard that fateful news. I figured the clean ocean air would help clean my mind of all the murkiness.

I sat at a nearby picnic table, and stared out at the many ships docked in the Harbor. The amount of stars in the pitch black sky was definitely a change from home. The air was colder too, than what I was used to. The wind blowing through the inky night cut through my sweatshirt easily. Though I was cold, I was in no hurry to make my way up the hill to my Aunt's Bar.

I was peaceful, if only for the moment.

I hadn't realized how lost in thought I had been until I heard the male voice next to me. "The Harbor is relaxing at night."

I could have jumped out of my skin for as startled as I was. "Shit."

The man laughed while I steadied my breathing. "Sorry there, I didn't mean to startle you. I thought you heard me coming though. I wasn't exactly being quiet." His voice was deep and soothing, slightly rough as if he smoked too many cigarettes.

"No, its cool." I shook my head, smiling slightly as I returned my gaze to the Harbor. "I've been in lost in my own world for a while now."

"The sea does that to people."

I nodded, not really listening to him. His voice was melodic and seemed to cut straight through to my soul, though his words were lost on deaf ears. His presence was comforting, not what I was expecting from a total stranger.

"The Martians come in over that mountain,"

"Huh?" And he caught me zoning out again. I looked over at him to find him smiling. From the single light pole that lit the parking lot in the distance behind us, I could barely make out his face. The high cheekbones were prominent, as were the nose and defined jaw, but it was the sparkly whites that almost glowed in the dark when smiled, that seemed to draw me in.

"You were zoning out again," His smile was easy and reached his eyes. He didn't seem to mind me not paying much attention to him. In fact he seemed very amused by it.

I smiled for real this time. "Sorry, I can't seem to clear my mind these days."

He shrugged, "It's cool." He was staring out at the ships before glazed over at me again. "So is there a reason you're sitting out here in the dark? The Docks aren't exactly the safest place at night."

"Nah, just got caught in the sea, I guess." I studied him for a moment trying to figure out of he was someone to be worried about when I asked, "What are you doing out here?"

"I had to grab my phone from the ship. Saw you on my way back up the hill. You looked like you could use someone to talk to." His honesty made me blush. I hadn't realized I had looked so lost.

"Are you a fisherman?" I asked, steering to a safer topic.

He smirked at me and nodded, "Yeah."

I blushed and shook my head at my own stupidity. He had just told me he came from a ship. "Sorry."

He grinned and shook his head. "No harm. You've been off in your world, remember?"

I had to laugh at that. It was true.

"But yes, I'm a fisherman. Mostly crab, but during the spring and summer some herring and salmon."I nodded and stared out at the ocean again. "You're not from around here, are you?" his voice was gentle, though slightly amused.

"That obvious?"I smiled when I looked over at him.

He was grinning as he nodded slightly. "I think it's more the flip flops that give you away."

I blushed as I looked down at my lime green flip flops. "Yeah, kinda cold for no shoes."

He laughed and nodded. "Just a little." He shifted to look at me, "So are you going to tell me why you're sitting out here in the cold alone?"

I shrugged, "Not much to tell really. I guess I'm just dragging my feet."

He nodded and looked out over the Harbor. There was a silence between us for a long time while we both drifted in to our thoughts. "So where you from?" he finally asked.

"Doesn't really matter," I shrugged. I exhaled slowly, watching my breath circle and dance in front of me.

He shrugged and nodded. "So where are you headed?"His voice was light, but I was starting to wonder if he was getting cold, and worried about leaving a strange girl near the docks at night.

"Some bar, up the hill," I shrugged.

He laughed and shook his head, his teeth glittering in the moonlight. "You came all this way to go to 'some bar?'" he questioned.

I laughed at stupid it sounded coming out of his mouth. "Yeah, when you put it like that, it does sound stupid. But I'm meeting someone there."

"Not stupid," he corrected immediately, "just strange." He smiled and shifted again. I could tell he was getting restless. "Well the only bar on the hill is the Elbow Room. And that just happens to be where I'm headed." He stood slowly, looking down at me. "I could walk you there, if you want? I'd hate for something to happen to you because I left you alone at the Docks at night."

I shrugged and slowly stood on my feet, feeling the blood slowly rush down to my toes. I hadn't realized how cold I had been until I started shivering. He didn't mention it though, and let me slowly grab my lime green duffel bag from the ground. I had forgotten I had it for a minute.

I threw the strap over my shoulder and looked up him, noticing how tall he was for the first time. He had to be almost a foot taller than me. He turned and I followed without a word. As we walked along, the thought crossed my mind that I was allowing a total stranger to lead me through a unknown place in the dark. The circumstances should have made me on the alert in case he tried something, but all I could feel was a sense of calm. Something I hadn't felt in such a long time.

"You ready?" he asked, pulling me from my thoughts.

I looked up from the path and looked around. We had stopped walking, and had come within inches of a door to a slightly run down shack of a building. The music blaring through the walls and windows made me wonder how I had missed it coming up the hill. "Oh," I sighed, when I read the lettering on the door. The Elbow Room. "That was quick."

He smiled, "You zoned out again." In the lights hung off the building, I could see his eyes were a warm milk chocolate and he worse a goatee that seemed to have grown in during the last couple of days.

The light definitely did wonders for him really, not that the dark had made him look any less handsome. In light you could see that he was lean, though the muscles under his black hoody were defined. It was nice to be able to see who had been kind enough to sit in the dark with a total stranger while they only half listened to you.

"Sorry," I couldn't help but blush.

He shrugged, but grinned. "You ready to go in, or do you need a minute?"

I forced myself to look away from him and back to the door of the bar. Straightening my shoulders, I stood up straight and hoisted my duffel higher. "Ready as I'll ever be," I sighed.

He paused, watching me a moment, before pulling the door and holding it open for me. I walked in to the small cramped bar and was greeted with a wall of cigarette smoke and the scent of too many spilled beers. The noise volume was deafening at first, the music much louder than it was outside and the many men and women that were crammed in the area were yelling to be heard.

As I looked around for where my Aunt might be, there was a loud shriek admitted from the bar, causing half the patrons to look up in wonder. "Batten down the hatches boys!" the female yelled walking around the bar, her blond curly hair bouncing on her shoulders. "Trouble's just gone walked back in my life!" her voice carried high over the music and across the room, many faces turning to follow her.

Her antics had always made me smile, and this time was no different. "Aunt Mae," I greeted. She was a few inches taller than me, and thin.

"Oh Baby Girl, it is DAMN good to see you!"She tossed her arms around me in a hug fit for a bear, nearly squeezing the death out of me. "Damn girl, let me get a look at you," she grinned pulling back to arms length.

She searched my blue eyes and straight black hair that fell just past my shoulders, letting her eyes wander over my small mouth and nose before doing it all over again."Still gorgeous as ever!" she announced when she was through.

I laughed and shook my head, extremely happy to be in my Aunt's presence again. "You too Aunt Mae, for real, you don't look a day over twenty-five."

"And still a smartass!" she laughed. For being twice my age, she looked amazing. The laugh lines were there, along with the crows feet, but they just accentuated her beauty in ways that made her look smarter, wiser. She threw her arm around my shoulders and yelled over the music again, catching the attentions of those who had allowed us our moment alone.

"Alright everyone! This is my niece Kaighliegh! Kales, this is everyone!" she announced.

There was a course of hellos, to which I smiled and waved. The people seemed friendly enough, if albeit a tad nosy, but I didn't mind too much. I did shake my head at Mae though and laughed as she walked us through the throng of people back to the bar. "You're still amazing, Aunt Mae, you know that?"

She grinned and nodded, "You on the other hand are too skinny!" she decided. "You must be starving. It's probably been hours since you've eaten?"

I nodded, realizing for the first time, just how hungry I had been. It had been damn near sixteen hours since I had eaten a decent meal.

"And don' think I didn't notice how damn frozen you were either! What were you sitting out by the docks for hours?" she demanded, grabbing my bag off my shoulder as she made her way around the bar.

"At least one, since I found her," a male voice answered her behind me, startling me once again. It was the man from the docks. I had forgotten he had followed me into the bar.

"I don't doubt it Josh!" Mae grinned at him as he took a seat next to me at the bar. She tossed my bag on the floor in the corner and came to stand in front us. "Young lady, what the hell did I tell you about all that thinking and worrying goin on inside that head of yours?"

"It'll cause wrinkles," I answered, rolling my eyes though smiling at the thought of it. Aunt Mae really did know how to get me out of whatever funk I was usually in. I didn't know why it took me so long to get my ass up to see her.

"And worries cause warts!" Josh finished.

"Damn straight!" she nodded, causing them both to laugh. "And what about your damn shoes girl? This ain't Chicago; it ain't no 90 degrees here in the summer!"

"That's what I wanted to know! Didn't get much of a straight answer though," he grinned, winking at me.

I couldn't stop the flutters in my stomach, but I forced myself not to blush as I smiled at him. "Airline issues," I relented.

"I'm guessin that's where the rest of your bags are too? I know you didn' come to spend the summer with me and only brought one bag!"

"Are you trying to say I pack a lot?!" I yelled causing her to laugh.

"No one in their damned mind would plan on heading for cold weather in the middle summer and bring only one bag!" she grinned.

"She's right though," Josh smiled over at me.

I shook my head and shrugged. "The airline said that my bags could either be in Phoenix or Jacksonville. Basically they have no idea."

"Two damn different ends of the country! Dumbasses!" Mae slapped her hand down on the bar, making a point. "Don't you worry about a thing Kales, we'll get you whatever you need!"

I smiled and shrugged, "Sure."I glanced over at Josh to find him watching me with a small smile on his lips.

"I see you've met Josh already?" Mae smirked over at him.

"Not formally," he grinned, holding out his hand. "Josh Harris," he offered.

That time I did blush. I couldn't help it as I reached out and shook his hand. "Kaighliegh Halen," I replied.

He smiled and shook my hand, his eyes never leaving my face. "Welcome to Dutch Harbor, Kaighliegh." His voice was doing that melodic thing again, where it cut straight through to my soul. The way my name flowed off his lips sent shivers down my spine.

It was as that moment that I heard the loud male voices behind me yelling for their companion. Josh and I looked over to see a group of three other guys sitting at a table in the corner, cards and poker chips set and ready. "Looks like they're waiting for you," I smiled at him.

He nodded and waved to the guys. "Well, it was nice meeting you Kaighliegh," he murmured, turning his gaze to me again.

"Thanks for walking me up the hill, even if I did keep zoning out."

He laughed good naturedly and stood up. "Anytime." He paused and stared down at me for a moment, as if thinking of something else to say. "I'm sure I'll see you around here soon."

I nodded, regaining my composer and didn't even notice his very nice ass sway in his blue jeans as he walked away. Okay, I noticed a little bit.

"So he's definitely adorable and very available," Aunt Mae said, bringing me from my thoughts.

I looked up to find her standing right in front of me, smiling cheekily. I rolled my eyes and shook my head, though smiled anyways. "I'm not interested in finding anyone right now." And that was very true. After everything I had been through, I was is no right mind to start dating.

She didn't give me a smile of pity or pat my hand. She did however study me for a moment before speaking, "Okay, how about some grub?"She didn't wait for me to answer, she just moved to the end of the bar, grabbed a menu, and placed it open before me.

I grinned, grateful to have skipped over the conversation. "Grub would be amazing right now."

As the night wore on the bar seemed to have grown only louder and more packed in. More and more people came to introduce themselves to me, and after the first couple of guys, I had no idea who was whom. It was around one when I had enough. I had forgotten how Aunt Mae was a lifer and had been doing this kind of thing a lot longer than I had. I hadn't done much partying in well over a year and after sixteen hours on a plane; I was more than ready for bed.

"You look like you're ready to fall asleep." Josh startled me as he came up next to me at the bar. I hadn't really moved much since I had claimed my seat earlier that night. Though my dinner plate had been taken away, my sprite that I was nursing never seemed to leave my hands.

I smiled drowsily at him and nodded, "It's been a long time since I've been up this late,"

"I can see that." He grinned and took a seat next to me.

"Josh! See ya later!"

We looked over to see his buddies head out the door. He waved back before he turned back to me. "We have an early day tomorrow."

"So shouldn't you be heading back with them?"

"Trying to get rid of me?" His grin was infectious and I found myself shaking my head. "Good. Besides you look like you're ready to crash. How about I walk you home?"

"Oh Josh you'd be such an angel!" Mae yelled over the music, suddenly appearing before us. "Here's your set of keys baby girl! I won't be done with this place for a couple hours yet. You go home and get some rest darling." I looked up at Mae as she was handing Josh my duffel bag. Maybe this was exactly why I left Chicago for Alaska. Maybe I just needed Aunt Mae to take care of me.

As I slid off the stool, Mae came walking around the bar toward me. She placed her hands on either side of my face and smiled. "You're gonna be okay here Baby Girl. Have faith." Her smile might have been sincere, but when she patted my cheeks I could take anymore.

I smiled sadly and shook my head away from her hands. I turned on my heel and walked toward the door, leaving Josh standing with Mae. I couldn't stop the tears from falling once I made it outside. Mae knew me so well. She knew what happened, she knew how I reacted, and she knew I wasn't over it. She knew why I was in Alaska before I even did.

I stared out at the Harbor from the top of the hill and let the cold ocean air dry my eyes as I lost myself to the undertow inside my head. "Hey, you okay?" Josh was standing next to me, and though I hadn't known he was there, he luckily didn't startle me.

I wiped the remaining moisture off my face before I nodded. "Yeah, great." I looked up at him. I almost laughed at the worried expression on his face. Men never really knew how to handle women when they cried. And for someone they just met, things went awkward fast. I smiled to reassure him and nodded again. "So where's Mae's house from here?"

"Oh yeah, this way." He shrugged a shoulder in the direction behind him and slowly turned, watching me until I started following him.

I really tried hard not to lose myself in thought as I walked alongside Josh. The situation was already awkward enough for the poor guy. "So when does crab season start?"

He glanced over and smiled, probably grateful for the small talk. "King Crab starts in October."

"That's your main income, right? You said you fished mostly crab..."

His grin was broad as he looked at me, "So you _were_ listening?"

I laughed, but nodded. "Maybe a little." He laughed as well, a gentle melody for my ears alone. "But when is snow crab season?" I asked.

"Opilio," he corrected, "starts in January. So you know about crab?"

"Some. My dad told me some things here and there." I shrugged, feeling myself withdraw again. It seemed like there was always something that reminded me of something else, that led me right back to the reason for me being in Dutch Harbor. The irony of the full circle of events was not lost on me though.

He nodded sensing that I was closing up again. "Mae's house is just another block down this way." I had almost forgotten we were walking again. I shook my head and looked around. Three blocks straight down from The Elbow Room, and one block left toward the ocean.

Mae's house stood tall on the cliff, overlooking the ocean. The house had been in her family for years, having been the house both her and my mother grew up in. "I remember this place," I whispered, mostly to myself. I came to stop at the end of the driveway, to get a good look at the two-story house. It looked the same as I remember it as a kid. Though the white paint was peeling a little, the black shutters seemed to be in one piece, and though it was dark, the large porch was lit well. Aunt Mae always left a light on for the returning sailor.

"You've been here before?" Josh asked, over hearing me.

I nodded. "Too many years ago." I started walking up the driveway toward the front door without a word.

He followed behind me, letting me take the lead. I fished the set of keys Mae gave me out of my pocket and fumbled only momentarily getting the front door open. "Well this is where I leave you Kaighliegh Halen." He grinned as I turned back to him once the door was open.

I smiled and took my duffel from him. "Thank you for walking me home, and earlier too, down by the docks. I really appreciate it. You've been kind."

And in the porch light of Mae's old family house, Josh Harris blushed as he looked down at me. "Any time." He watched me for a moment before he continued. "We're actually leaving on fishing trip for the next couple of days. We should be back by Friday. Maybe I'll see you later?"

It was my turn to blush, but I smiled and nodded. "Yeah, I'd like that."

He nodded, grinning, and turned away.

As I shut the door to the cold Alaskan summer night, I smiled, feeling happier than I had in months.

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**This chapter was re-uploaded due to inconsistancies between names. Thank you to those who pointed it out. The Edit has been made. Please review!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hi everyone! Welcome back to Finding My Way. I hope everyone enjoyed the last chapter. Not really sure though, I didn't hear from very many of you.**

**But a very special thanks to Metalbitch18, Wildviolet76, and Ewab. Thanks for the reviews! Every little bit of encouragement or critisism is appreciated.**

**Enjoy chapter 2!**

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Chapter 2.

The next morning found me moaning and groaning as I slowly sat up from Mae's old well loved couch. I stretched my back out, arms raised above my head, arching my back and listening to the popping of my spine realigning.

"I have a guest room or two, you know," Aunt Mae quipped as she walked toward me from the attached kitchen, carrying two mugs of coffee.

Sighed, I leaned back into the worn couch and wrapped the fleece blanket around my body, tucking my legs up under me. "Thanks," I murmured, taking the offered mug from her as she took a seat next to me.

"So why didn't you make it upstairs?"

I looked over at her with a lazy smile. "Too exhausted. I saw the couch, dropped my bag, and was out before I even knew what happened."

She laughed and patted my thigh. "Yeah sixteen hours on a plane will do that to someone."

"Not to mention the stress and hassle of dealing with lost luggage." I rolled my eyes as I took a sip of my steaming cup of coffee. "Mmm," I moaned, closing my eyes and savoring the taste. "This is good."

"Fresh beans. I've been telling your old man for years."

"Dad always has been stubborn about his coffee."

"Years on a crab boat will do that."Mae sounded affectionate as she spoke about my father.

"Yeah, I think he misses it sometimes." I stared out the large picture window in the living room to the Harbor below.

"I'm sure he probably does, Baby Girl. It's in his blood." She paused and took a sip of her coffee before she continued. "It was in your mother's too."

I closed my eyes for a moment before slowly opening them. "Yes it was," I confirmed returning my gaze to the ocean. There was silence while we both took in the morning and sipped our mugs. "Dad's been talking about moving back," I blurted.

Mae's eyes flashed to me and she looked astonished. "Wondered when I was gonna hear something about that. About damned time too."I grinned and stood slowly from the couch, listening to my joints whine and protest. "Damn girl, you're sounding as old as me."

I laughed and shook my head. I dropped the blanket to the couch in a heap and headed toward the kitchen to set my empty mug in the sink. "So is there anywhere good to go for a run around here?" I asked, as I gazed out at the wooded wilderness in Mae's back yard.

"You still running every day?" she grinned as she stood up to join me. I nodded as she placed her own empty mug in the sink beside mine.

"Yeah, I'm up to twelve miles now."

She chuckled and nodded, "That's pretty damn good, baby girl! You see that path out there?" She pointed the far back in the center of the yard there was a what like a little wider than a deer path leading out into the Alaskan wilderness. "That path will take you up along this mountain ridge behind Dutch Harbor and over across the bay over there." Mae moved to front picture window in the living room. I followed her to see where she was pointing out to across the bay.

On the opposite Cliffside, right where the woods met the parking lot and ocean there was a wider, manmade path with sand and gravel leading into the woods. "Oh hell yeah. How long is that?" I asked, suddenly excited.

"About thirteen miles. But you remember that your not used to the altitude yet. Take it easy for a while and let your lugs adjust. I don't need you gettin all light headed on me. Your old man would skin me alive."

I grinned and nodded. "Sure thing Aunt Mae. I'm gonna go get dressed."I grabbed my duffle bag and headed for the stairs, intent on searching for a spare guest room.

"The last door on the right at the end of the hall!" Mae called up the stairs at me.

"Okay," I answered. I pushed open the door and smiled. Mae had set up the room just for me. A queen sized bed sat in the middle of the room, furnished in blue and green. On either side of the bed stood nightstands with matching table lamps, against the opposite wall of the door stood a desk with a work lamp on it. It would be perfect for my laptop. Opposite the bed was a large closet that ran the length of the wall, and in the corner sat a small table with a little fifteen inch television. I instantly fell in love with the room.

I quickly changed my clothes into work out pants and a sweatshirt before heading down stairs. "You can borrow these for now," Mae offered holding out a pair of running shoes.

I grinned, "Thank you," I murmured taking them from her. I took a seat on the couch and quickly laced up both shoes. Once finished I stood and tested them out. "Mae, this isn't going to work. Your feet are bigger than mine." I sighed and sat back down.

Mae laughed and stepped on the end of the shoe. There was a close to an inch gap between my big toe and the end of the shoe. "I guess we're going shopping then!"

I smiled and shook my head at Mae's enthusiasm. "I should call the airline again when we get home."

"Yeah, let me talk to those dumbasses! I'll give them a piece of my mind." She smirked, her eyes narrowing mischievously.

"Come on crazy lady, let's spend some doe!" I headed to the front door, keys in hand.

Mae grabbed her coat from the rack near the door and followed me outside. She locked the door behind her and said, "This way," as she led the way to the garage. She punched in the door code and waited for the door to lift open. "You drive," she nodded toward the old '95 Jeep Cherokee. She headed toward the passenger side and I shrugged, heading for the driver's side.

I quickly changed the mirrors and seat to my liking. "You can use my car whenever you want baby girl. I don't go out all that often, and I walk to the bar, so I'll let you know if I ever need it."

I grinned. "Hell yeah! Thanks Mae! Though I doubt I'll use it much more than you."

The rest of the day was spent driving around the connecting Fox Islands, which Aunt Mae informed me were the name of the most eastern part of the Aleutian Islands. We did some shopping and light site seeing. Mostly Mae spent the time pointing out different places I could go shopping or out to eat. There were some different paths around the islands that she noted were good for running as well.

When we got back later that afternoon, I gave Mae the flight information concerning my missing bags and laced up my new Nike's. I had been dying to check out that mountain trail that led out of Mae's backyard. "You make sure you keep an eye out for Grizzlies, you hear?" Mae called from the kitchen.

I smiled and looked over at Mae. "And what the hell am I supposed to do if I come across one?"

"Run and hide, Baby Girl, run and hide." Her smile was cheeky and deliberate, though she wasn't looking at me. The stacks of papers before her contained all my flight information and any other relative information she might need while speaking to the airlines.

I shook my head at her and stood up. Leave it to Mae to make a joke of something as serious as a grizzly bear attack. Bouncing on my heels and then rolling forward on the balls of my feet, I tested my new shoes, hoping they didn't give me too bad of blisters my first time out.

Mae looked up from the papers and grinned, "You know if you can't make the whole thirteen miles, there's a half way point that leads out of the woods. It comes out near downtown Dutch."

I smirked and shook my head. "Nope, I won't be needing it Aunt Mae, but thanks."

"Girl, that stubbornness is gonna get you in a lot of trouble some day." She smirked at me, knowing full well where my stubbornness came from.

I laughed and shrugged, "I'll see you later Aunt Mae."

"Be safe Baby Girl."

I nodded and went out the front door. I walked around the house to the back yard, bouncing slightly in my new shoes. Though I ran usually twelve miles daily, the thought of doing it in the crisp sea air and mountainous terrain had me slightly giddy.

When my feet his the path I start a slow jog out of Mae's yard. Breathing slowly, I allowed the cold air to gradually cool my skin and numb my body. As I jogged further and my body temperature started to rise, I picked up speed, slowly gaining until I was at my desired stride.

Soon I lost myself to the thoughts in my heads and the pounding of my heart. It had been a long while since I ran alone with just my thoughts as company, preferring my thoughts alongside a soundtrack of my life. Usually something loud and with a good beat.

The path ran far into the woods, circling the outskirts of town. By the time I reached the halfway point trail, I was sweating profusely. Though my breathing was slightly labored, I pushed on, not even contemplating turning back.

By the time I reached the end of the trail though, I was ready to collapse. Though thirteen miles was only slightly farther than I was used to, it was the terrain that had me almost wheezing.

I took a moment to pace back and forth on the ocean line. The path had come out at a low point of the island, right where the parking lot met the ocean and the docks of Dutch Harbor. On the opposite side of the bay, the looming Cliffside stood tall above the Harbor. Mae's house was standing watch over the many ships anchored and unloading at the docks.

I stopped when I noticed to the left of Mae's house was an old commentary. I hadn't remembered it ever being that close to her house. Shaking my head to clear my muddled thoughts, I moved to a brisk walk to keep my heart and muscles moving in the cold air.

As I moved across the parking lot, past the docks and toward the hill, smiled as I thought about meeting Josh the night before. Though I had only just met him, I felt that there was something about him. I sighed and shook my head, trying to get the thoughts out. It was too soon to be moving on. Kevin's face flashed through my mind and I gasped. The pain was still to real, too raw.

The walk back up the hill took a lot less time than it felt like the night before, though my mind was slightly clearer than the night before. And the direct walk across the parking lot and up the hill to Mae's house took only ten minutes compared to my hour and half run around the outskirts of the small fishing village.

By the time I got back to Mae's she had the kitchen table set for two and was putting the last finishing touches on dinner. She grinned when she saw me. "Perfect time, baby girl. Go take a quick shower, I can smell you from here," she quipped. "Then hurry back, I've made your favorite."I could smell the spaghetti drifting upstairs as I took the steps two at a time.

When I came back down, Mae was pulling the garlic bread from the oven and setting it on the stove. "Mmm," I grinned, going to stand near the sink. Mae smiled as she grabbed my plate from the table and loaded noodles on it. "This looks amazing Mae," I complimented as I loaded meat sauce on my noodles.

"Thanks baby girl." She loaded her plate as well. She then grabbed the cooking sheet of garlic bread and moved to the small dinette table in the kitchen nook and set down the bread next to her.

I took a seat across from her and grabbed two slices of garlic bread. "You want milk?" I asked, standing back up.

She nodded, chewing her food. I grabbed two glasses from the drying rack next to the sink and moved over to the fridge. "So how was your run?"

I poured the glasses of milk and smiled. "It was longer, but the terrain is going to have me sore tomorrow." I sighed and put the milk in the back in the fridge.

I grabbed both glasses and turned in time to see Mae's smirk. "I'm sure sleeping on that ole couch of mine didn't help either."

I laughed and shook my head. "No, the couch wasn't very comfy." I picked up my fork and twirled it around on my plate circling the noodles into a need spindle around the end. "Mmm," I moaned as I put it my mouth and started chewing. "This is amazing."

Mae grinned and continued eating. After a few moments of silence Mae spoke. "So the dumbasses at the airline believe they found your bags."

I laughed and shook my head. "Where?"

Mae nodded, "Jacksonville, FL."

I looked up from my food and rolled my eyes. "That's ridiculous."

"I made sure they knew it too. So they've refunded half your money, and promised the bags would there by the end of the week. So if they're not here by Friday, we'll call them back."

I grinned and continued eating. "Thanks a lot Aunt Mae. Especially for getting that extra money back. I hadn't even thought of that." I had been too worried about everything else going to really even spend a whole lot of time caring about where my bags had been. I was becoming more and more glad to be back together with my Aunt.

I looked over at her, watching how concentrated she was on her meal. "The bar closed tonight?" I asked.

She nodded. "Yeah, Sunday's and Monday's usually. Come September though I'll stay open more. Things really pick up around here then."

"Crab season starts, right?" I asked.

She smiled and nodded. "Yeah, red crab starts."

"That's King Crab, right?"

"Sure is. You've been listening to your old man, huh?" she chuckled.

"Yes ma'am!" I grinned.

As we continued eating my thoughts drifted back to the cemetery next to Mae's property. I had visited mom's grave once and only once. In the onetime dad and I had come here to visit. I had been in seventh grade, and we had come for the funeral of his best friend.

"Is mom buried in the cemetery next door?"

My question caught Mae off guard. She looked up at me immediately and sighed, but nodded. "Why do you ask, baby girl?"

I shrugged. "I never knew it was so close to your house. I saw it today from across the harbor."

She smiled sadly and nodded, "It was the only place your mother wanted to be buried. She liked the idea of being so close to the house and being able to look down on the docks, waiting for your father to return from sea at the same time."

"Only he never returned to sea after mom's accident." I looked down letting the emotions over flow me as I twirled my fork around my plate, not really that hungry anymore.

"That's not true, baby girl." I looked up at Mae in shock. "He went back for two seasons. One King, and one Opilio."

"Why did he quit after that then?"

"I don't think he liked the feeling of returning to Dutch without your mother waiting for him at the docks."

"I stayed with you, right? When he was gone?"

She smiled and nodded sadly, "Yeah, you stay with me." There was something in the way her voice caught that had me watching her carefully. But whatever I thought I heard was gone as fast as it came. Mae was clearing her throat and smiling again.

She stood and walked to the sink and rinsed her empty plate. Through with dinner myself, I followed her lead and helped her put away the leftovers and wash the dishes.

Later that night, Mae started a fire in the pit in the back yard. She had just gotten it roaring when I went out to check on her. "Do you need anything?" I asked.

She nodded and grinned. "Some alcohol."I chuckled and handed her the glass of Jack Daniels and Coke. Mae smiled gratefully.

I took a seat in the canvas campfire chair in front of the fire as Mae did the same. I brought my own glass of Vodka and sprite as Mae took a sip of her drink. "Ahh, so you've still got it!" she smirked over at me.

I looked up from the fire and raised an eyebrow at her. "The drink baby girl, the drink. You still know how to make my drinks just the way I like them."

I grinned in response. My mind was still reeling over the conversation at dinner. The information revealed was slightly shocking. I knew my dad had been upset about fishing after my mom had passed, but I hadn't known he had still tried to do it; for her.

"You're thinking awfully loud over there." Mae's voice always had a way of pulling me from my thoughts instantly.

I shrugged and took a sip of my drink.

"What are you thinking about?"

I took another sip of my drink before I spoke, "What things would have been like if dad hadn't given up fishing."

Mae sighed and looked at me for a moment. "You know Kales, your daddy tried. He really did."

"I know Aunt Mae. He told me once. He said he needed something different after he quit fishing. He said that was why we moved."

Mae nodded and leaned back in her chair. "God baby girl, I haven't talked about your mother in years."

I smiled sadly, staring into the fire, knowing the feeling. "Yeah, dad doesn't like to talk about it much either."

"Kinda like how you don't like to talk about Kevin?" She watched my closely and I froze at hearing his name. I had been wondering when we would move on to him. "Kales, it's okay to talk about it. You need to. It's not healthy bottling up all that pain."

I looked down at my empty glass, wondering how it had disappeared so quickly.

"It's been two years since his accident," Mae started. My eyes flashed to her face at the mention of his death. I felt instant anger toward her for mentioning him in the first place. My boyfriend's death was still too raw a subject for me. My mother I could talk about. Kevin was still too hard. The accident was still too fresh in my mind, the wound too raw.

"What happened to him was an accident. Don't you think it's time to move on?"

Choosing not to blow up at Mae, I clenched my jaw and held my breath. Tears were welling up in my eyes and it took all my strength to keep them at bay. When Mae grabbed my hand, I lost it. The tears fell freely in gut wrenching sobs.

"Oh honey," she rose and wrapped me in a tight embrace. "Its okay, it's okay," she murmured.

Using Mae as my rock, I poured my heart out through my tears. The last two years seemed to come tumbling out of me like an avalanche and I wasn't sure I was ever going to stop crying.

Mae did exactly what I needed her to. She held me and rocked me, letting me cry into her shoulder, murmuring soothing words. It wasn't something I was expecting on my second night in Alaska, but Mae always had been able to see right through my facades.

Mae got me. It was as simple as that. Mae understood what I felt and would always be there for me.

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**Thanks for reading everyone! I know Josh wasn't in this chapter, other than in Kaighleigh's thoughts, but he'll be back, I promise!**

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**(This chapter was reloaded due to inconsistancies of Kevin's name. It has been fixed. Thank you again to those who pointed it out. I love the feedback.)**

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	3. Chapter 3

**R.I.P Captain Phil Harris. You will always be in our hearts. Thankyou for being who you were.**

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Chapter 3.

The next morning I woke to a dark sky and puffy eyes. My head was pounding, but my heart was lighter. I had needed last night more than I had realized. My heart had needed Mae, and that was why I had come to Alaska; to heal.

With a lighter mind, though still pounding, I stumbled into the bathroom to assess the damage. My black hair was sticking up in all angles, my eyeliner smudged on my cheeks. I looked ridiculous. I quickly washed my face, popped three Advil from the bottle I found in the medicine cabinet and changed into my running clothes.

The first floor was dark and quiet as I tied up my new running shoes. Mae must have still been sleeping. As I walked out the backdoor, I looked over to the fire pit and thoughts drifted back to our conversation.

I started jogging before I even made it to the path.

Brent and I had dated for a lifetime. Or at least that's how it felt. In reality we had only been together for three years. Though it had been two years since the accident that I lost Brent, he would forever be in my heart.

We had started dating our sophomore year of college, and though we took it slow, we quickly fell in love. He was my best friend. There had been no doubt in my mind that one day I would marry him.

Three years after we started dating and two days before our college graduation, Brent Michaels was killed in a car accident.

And my life as I had known it then was over.

As my thoughts drifted to Brent and our past, I ran hard and fast up and down the winding path through the mountainous woods. I reached the halfway point path in no time, but this time I was winded and breathing heavy.

The burning in my lungs and the pounding of my headache coupled with the strain I was putting my muscles under, were just what the doctor had ordered to help clear my muddled mind. The further I ran, the more my legs began to hurt and the more my muscles began to protest. I pushed myself as hard as I could go, harder than I had pushed myself before.

Tears were falling from my eyes from the pain in my legs. My lungs were burning. I forced myself to breathe through my nose as I ran toward the path end that was growing near. By the time I made it out of the woods and off the path near the waterfront, my vision was blurry and the tears were falling freely.

I collapsed to the ground in a heap, gasping in huge lungs full of air. My chest ached and my legs screamed, but my mind was clear. And in that moment, I couldn't have asked for anything better.

When I finally regained enough strength I forced myself to stand. My legs cried out in protest, but I ignored the pain as I stood. My legs shook slightly but I forced them to walk forward. The sooner the muscles were moving again, the less likely they were to cramp up on me.

I was wheezing slightly as I made my way across the parking lot and toward the hill. I wiped my eyes dry and watched out over the docks, forcing myself not too look up to the cemetery across the harbor.

There were many boats tied up, and at this time of morning they were full of activity. When my mind wandered to Josh I smiled slightly, though my thoughts quickly turned to what Brent would think of Josh. Would he like him? Probably, Brent liked everyone.

I shook my head; it was still too early to think of Josh that way. I had only met him the one time. It wasn't like we were going to start dating the next day or anything. But I couldn't help but think of when the next time I would see him again.

My breathing leveled out as I walked up the hill and past the Elbow Room. Before I knew it was turning down Mae's driveway and walking up to the house. As I walked inside, I heard the tell-tale sound of the coffee pot bubbling in the kitchen. Mae was up.

I smiled and made my way upstairs to grab a hot shower.

By the time I got out of the shower and made it downstairs fully dressed, the house smelled amazing. Mae was frying up some French toast when I walked in the kitchen. I headed over the coffee pot on the counter in the corner. There was already a clean mug set out. I grabbed the pot off the burner and poured myself a cupful. I set the pot back on the burner before shuffling over to the fridge to grab the creamer.

Mae and I were silent as we shuffled around the kitchen. She smiled to acknowledge my presence, but otherwise kept quiet. When my coffee was finally fixed the way I liked it with cream and sugar, I took a very rewarding sip. "Mmm." I grinned, closing my eyes and wrapping my hands around the warm mug. The heat was very nice after my run in the chilly sea air.

"How was your run?" Mae asked, as she flipped the toast in the frying pan.

"The best cure for a hang over there is." I smiled and took another sip of my coffee. I turned and leaned against the counter, watching her finish up breakfast.

"Been awhile since you've drank Kales?" She picked up the slices of toast in the pan with the spatula and plopped them down on a plate at the already set table. She motioned for me to sit down as she moved back to the stove.

"Yeah," I sighed. "You're a bad influence." I smirked at her and took my seat at the plate of steaming toast. French toast was my favorite.

I watched as Mae quickly had another couple of pieces of toast frying in the pan. "Girl, don't wait for me! Dig in!"

I chuckled and followed orders. By the time I was done adding butter and syrup to my toast, Mae was adding her own toast to her plate. I started to cut my toast into bite size pieces. By the time I was halfway through my plate Mae stood up and went for the coffee pot. After she topped off my mug and refilled hers I asked her, "So what do you have going on today?"

"Inventory at the bar," she replied. She sat back down and took a drink of her coffee.

I nodded and started eating. "You want help?" I asked through my chewing.

"Gee Kales! I thought you'd never ask!" her sarcasm was laid on thick and but her smile was genuine.

I smirked and shook my head. Of course Mae wanted my help at the bar. "It's Monday, right? You're still not open tonight, are you?"

"Nah, but I like to do inventory on Monday's. That way I can order what I need to early in the week, because by the weekend the place will be swamped."

I nodded and finished my plate. "When are you heading over there?" I sat back and watched as she finished the last few bites on her plate.

"Probably around ten." She didn't look up, just continued to clear her plate.

I glanced at the clock; it was only 8:15.

"I need to run some errands first."

I nodded and stood up. Collecting my plate and silverware, I moved to the sink to start cleaning up breakfast. I quickly washed my plate and silverware as Mae sat and finished her coffee. As I was moving onto the frying pan, Mae stood and brought her dirty dishes over. Together we finished cleaning the kitchen and putting the used dishes away.

Before I knew it we were heading out the door and down the street, headed for town.

Our first stop was the Unalaska General Store. Mae needed her usual blood pressure prescription. High blood pressure was common in our family when the age hit, though with the right diet and low dose controller meds, it was easily controlled. It was the unfortunate family flaw that I had to look forward to when I became Mae's age.

It was in the General Store that I first saw all the Deadliest Catch paraphernalia. There were shirts and sweatshirts, sweat pants and pictures; all depicting logos or pictures of different boats in the Fleet. "What the hell?" I asked. My gaze had landed on an enlarged photograph of a turquoise vessel with yellow trim. On the hull of the vessel, the name Cornelia Marie was painted in matching yellow letters. Standing on the dock before the massive ship were five men. Among the men standing before the boat was Josh. The same Josh I had met just a few days before down by the docks. At the bottom of the photograph there was a logo for both Deadliest Catch and Discovery Channel.

Mae had walked over just as I had spoke. "Don't tell me you didn't know!" she grinned and laughed.

"Know what? What's Deadliest Catch?" I asked, looking over the other pictures. There were similar photo of other vessels, including the Time Bandit, Northwestern, and Wizard.

"Oh Kaighliegh!" Aunt Mae chuckled and patted my shoulder. "You've really been out of the loop the last couple of years, baby girl."

Well grieving did that to a person. College life left little time for TV when I was taking on extra course loads and working part time. And when I wasn't doing either of those, there were plenty of parties and extracurricular activities to keep me occupied. There was also Kevin. Kevin was always there.

"Hello? Anyone in there?" Mae waved a hand in front of my face to bring me back to the present.

"Sorry." I sighed and turned away from the display.

"Kales its fine. Deadliest Catch is just a TV show on the Discovery Channel. They follow the Crab Fishermen while they're at sea."

"And Josh is just one of those Crab Fishermen?" I tried to sound nonchalant but Mae didn't buy it.

To give her credit though, she didn't say anything. She smiled but nodded. "Yeah he works for his dad on the Cornelia Marie." She turned toward the photograph. "That's his dad Phil, and his younger brother Jake."

I turned back to the display and studied the photo Mae was talking about. His brother Jake I had noticed immediately as one of guys Josh was hanging out with my first night in town. His father Phil looked like he'd be a decent man though. He looked hardened after the years of hard work, but he looked like he'd be a nice enough man.

"So is the show really big or something? Or this just some home town love?" I asked, gesturing to the massive display of all things 'Deadliest Catch.' There were t-shirts and sweatshirts, full season DVDs and autographed photographs.

"Kales darling, you have a lot to learn Baby Girl." Mae smirked and put her arm around me. She turned and headed for the door, her bag of medicine in her hand.

I shrugged and rolled my eyes. I didn't really care either way. I was here to get over my past and Kevin; to help make peace with my mother, but most of all, to help my favorite Aunt with the bar. I wrapped my arm around Mae and leaned my head against her shoulder, walking out of the General Store with her.

It was later that evening while cleaning out a storage closet at the Elbow Room that I stumbled across the photograph. It was a picture of Aunt Mae and my father. They were sitting down by the docks, both smiling and looking out at the sea. I smiled and dusted it off. Grabbing the dusty frame, I headed of the storage room in search of Mae.

I found her sitting in her office looking over some papers, reading glasses perched on her nose. She looked absolutely adorable. "Look what I found," I grinned, walking toward her.

She looked up with a questioning glace and smiled when I showed her the photo. "Oh wow," she breathed. "This was a long time ago." Her smile grew nostalgic and her gaze was misty. She touched the photograph briefly, staring.

"When was that?" I murmured.

Mae looked startled when she looked up at me. I had interrupted something brewing in that head of hers. She quickly smiled and shook her head, "Summer, the year before you were born. It was before they left for Salmon Tendering."

"You and my dad were close, weren't you?" I asked. I had known that my parent's had all been friends for years before they started dating, and that Mae was included in the group of friends. But I had a feeling there was more to their history than anyone cared on sharing.

"Yeah." Mae sighed and handed me the framed photograph. "He was my best friend."

I took the photo and raised an eyebrow at Mae. "Really? I had no idea."

She smiled and nodded, seeming lost in her thoughts. "What time is it baby girl? I'm sure it's getting late."

I nodded and glanced over to the clock sitting on a shelf behind her. "It's one o'clock already."

She nodded, distracted with her papers again. I turned and left Mae in her office with a yawn. I headed toward the bar and poured myself and Mae a drink. It looked as if a long night was before us.

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**Thankyou to all those who have reviewed. It is deeply appreciated. I know you're probably wondering where Josh is, but he's coming, I promise you. **

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	4. Chapter 4

**Welcome to chapter 4. Its taken me a while to get this posted in light of Captian Phil. Its kind of hard to write about someone when you know they're going through so much heartache in real life. But since this is a work of fiction, and I don't know or own anyone from Deadliest Catch, I'm going to do my best to continue on with this story.**

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Chapter 4.

By the time Saturday morning had rolled around, it had been a week since I arrived in Dutch Harbor, and I had finally settled into a routine. I usually woke up around 7:30, changed into my running clothes, and hit the trail.

Though the trail still slightly kicked my ass, I was finally getting my lungs into the shape they would need to be if I planned on staying with Mae for the next couple of months. I breezed along the path, my beloved iPod sent music blaring in my ears. I felt content as the guitar riffs accompanied me in the Alaskan Wilderness.

My thoughts were mostly silent, letting the music tell the tale for them. Every once in a while they would drift to my aunt and the bar. She spent so much of her time there I had started to wonder why she bothered to keep the house on the cliff. The bar had a better view of the Harbor because you were closer to it, and she had a room above the bar that was converted into an apartment. But she stayed at the house her family grew up in. It said a lot about Mae's personality.

I cleared my head by pushing the volume up louder on my iPod. There had been plenty of things plaguing my thoughts in the last few days; Mae was just one of them. I still hadn't gotten the courage up to go to the cemetery to visit my mother. I tried to avoid looking at it when came out of the trail. I had a feeling today wouldn't be any different.

Shaking my head and smiling at scatterbrained thoughts, I passed the half way point in no time. I was hardly feeling the ache in my muscles as ran faster and harder in the second half of the trail.

This time my head stayed clear as I concentrated on my lungs and muscles as I pushed them harder and faster than I had all week. I was flying by the time I came out of the forest and down the path toward the ocean. I came to brief halt, jogging in place while I allowed lungs the replacement of oxygen. I only took the moment to grab a breath before I was off, jogging this time, through the parking lot and past the docks.

I glanced at the row of boats tied up and spotted a blue boat tied up toward the far end. It was the Cornelia Marie. I had recognized it immediately from the photo Mae had shown me. The flutter in my stomach at the sight of the boat unsettled me. I may have decided it was time to move on from Kevin, but I was only just started to move on and moving too fast scared me.

I turned my gaze from the ship and concentrated on the parking lot before me, letting my mind drift clear as I picked up the pace, returning to my original speed. I reached the hill and had completely forgotten about the boat by the time I flew past the Elbow Room, heading home after the grueling run.

This time when I jogged into Mae's driveway, my gaze drifted past the house to cemetery beside it. I quickly looked away and walked past the house and down the driveway to the backyard. I tossed my right leg up on the picnic table and started stretching out my hamstring and calve. I leaned over my leg as far as I could to let the muscles loosen. I quickly changed position to do the other leg. When I was through stretching I headed in the house through the back door.

Mae was sitting on a bar stood at the kitchen island reading a newspaper. We nodded our greeting and I headed for the stairs for a shower. When I was done and dressed, Mae had breakfast readying and was already eating. The routine was my favorite thing about living with Mae. She was like me, a creature of habit. I liked my routine and the sense of order and control it brought to my life.

"So you happy you have your bags back?" Mae questioned as I sat down with my coffee.

"You have no idea Aunt Mae! It only took them long enough." My bags had come the day before and it was a godsend. I had thrown everything in to the washing machine immediately not trusting the air port with the contents of the two large suitcases I had checked in.

Mae smirked and finished eating. I ate quickly and did the dishes for Mae while she changed her clothes and got ready for the day. When I was finished she was back in kitchen gathering her things.

It was Saturday, so that meant a busy day and night at the bar. Fridays and Saturdays Mae was open for lunch and opened at 11:00. That meant we left the house by 8:30 so we could get some work done at the bar before it opened.

"I need you to make the bank deposit this mornin. I have some paper work I need to catch up." Mae grabbed her house keys and the money purse she used as a wallet, and headed for the door.

I followed Mae grabbing my black sack of a purse off the counter and tossed my house keys inside. We both grabbed our coats off the rack by the front door before heading out. I locked the door before following Mae down the driveway. I had really started to like our walks to work every day. It was another part of my routine that I appreciated.

When we reached the Elbow Room, we cut through the back parking lot to the path heading toward the front door. When we reached the front of the building, we were on the top of hill looking down at docks of Dutch Harbor. "Will ya look at that, the Cornelia Marie is in town." Mae smirked over her shoulder at me.

I rolled my eyes and smiled. "Oh Aunt Mae, cool it already."

Mae chuckled and opened the door to the bar. "I'm just pullin ya leg girl!"

I followed Mae into the bar and smiled. "It's like you're planning a wedding or something!"

"Nah, not yet Baby Girl. You gotta have a date first before a weddin!" Her grin was as cheeky as she thought she was being.

I couldn't help but laugh at her logic. "Aunt Mae! I'm not here to be finding Mr. Right." I walked behind the bar toward Mae's office, following her lead.

"He doesn't have to be Mr. Right. He could be Mr. Right Now." Mae looked back at me over her shoulder. She was pleased with herself. Her shit-eating grin told me at least that much.

I laughed and shook my head. "Oh woman, you are going to be the death of me." She laughed as we both tossed or stuff on to her desk and headed back out to the main room. "Do you want help wiping down tables or do you want me to go to the bank now?"

She put her hands on her hips and assessed the situation. We had cleaned up a lot before we had left the night before, more than Mae used to before I started helping. "I think the tables just need to be wiped down, and you can do that when you get back!"

I grinned and nodded. "Sounds good." I turned back to her office and walked to the large walk-in closet in the back of the room. Hidden from view in small room was a Safe as large enough to fit a three year old. I swirled the dial around on the old spin dial. The safe itself had to be almost thirty years old. It was something my grandparents had bought back in the early '80's.

Having had much practice on the dial in my short week helping Mae at the bar, I quickly popped the door open and grabbed the two blue zippered money bags off the shelf. Mae and I had balanced the cash register both after lunch and at the end of the night yesterday. Friday's were busier than the rest of the week.

I shut the safe closed behind and me and spun the dial for safety. I closed the closet door behind me and headed toward Mae's desk. I grabbed my purse and decided the green zip up knitted sweater I was wearing over the black long sleeved shirt would be good enough in the mild 45 degrees outside. Mae had informed me that morning on our walk over to the bar that "it was the mildest weather they'd had in a long time."

I wasn't about to skip out on the chance of a nice day in Alaska. So in jeans and a sweater and with a pair of Vans on my feet, I headed back out of the Elbow Room with my purse and the two bags of money. I tossed the two bags in to a black plastic liquor bag for concealment and headed toward the door. "Later Aunt Mae!" I called out behind me, shutting the door before she could say anything.

Outside there was a slight breeze coming off the Harbor that almost sent me back inside for my jacket. Though the temp was mild, the breeze cut through the knitted material of my sweater and caused me to shiver slightly. Ignoring it, I started walking down the street toward the bank that was halfway down the hill to the docks. Nice and easy for the fishermen. A bit of hassle for everyone else, or so I was told.

I personally didn't mind where the bank was. I was still going to end up walking there no matter where it was located. It only took me a few minutes to walk and before I knew it I was out of the cool breeze and into the warmer air.

It only took me a moment to realize there were at least 7 people in front of me in line. The fishermen must have all had the same idea to be there when bank opened that morning. I sighed and shifted my weight, prepared to wait. I had a feeling it was going to be crowded on a Saturday. Mae explained earlier in the week, that during the summer the town was mostly quiet during the week, but the weekends offered a little more life until October hit and the Crab Fleet returned.

"Oh hey Kaighliegh!" a voice ahead of me said.

I looked up to find Josh Harris standing two people ahead of me. I grinned warmly. "Hey Josh! How was your trip?" I asked him.

He grinned and stepped out of line, motioning for the two guys behind him to move up. He came and stood next to me and nodded, grin still present on his face. "It wasn't bad, but we got delayed. We were supposed to be back yesterday."

I had completely forgotten he had said they were going to be back by Friday. I shrugged, still smiling. "That's fishing, isn't it? Not exactly the most predictable profession there is."

He laughed and shook his head. "No, definitely not. But how have you been? Your bags ever get delivered?"

I laughed and shook my head. "Yesterday," I nodded. I couldn't help but watch him. He looked good with a week's worth of stubble on his face. He wore a black beanie on his head covering his no doubt messy hair, and simple grey hoodie and jeans made him look very comfortable.

"No way. Seriously, it took them almost a week?" He glanced forward and noticed the line had moved forward one person.

I nodded as I moved forward. "The airlines weren't very helpful. Mae really gave them a piece of her mind."

"I would have paid to see that!" he laughed. "I love when Mae gives someone one a piece of her, especially when it's not me!" His blue eyes danced in amusement while their glow was warm and inviting.

I laughed and moved up another space in line. There were two windows open, each taking a customer and luckily they were moving the line along pretty quickly.

"Wait till Crab Season starts! Mae will be a riot then. It's a good thing you're here to help her out!" We both moved forward again, leaving only three people in line ahead of us.

"Yeah, that's what she keeps telling me. I'm starting to get excited for it myself." Every time someone brought up the upcoming crab season I would get more excited. The idea of all those fishermen around telling all the different stories of the sea, gave me hope for an inside look to the life my father gave up after my mother passed. It would be an inside look to what my life might have been like had my father kept fishing and we had stayed in Alaska.

"That's really cool," Josh smiled. The door chimed and he glanced over my shoulder as a loud voice announced, "Josh, hurry up man. We've got things to do yet."I glanced over to see a short man wearing yellow rain slicker overalls and black hoodie. "Oh hello," he said when noticed me.

"Kaighliegh, this is my _little_ brother Jake. Jake, this Kaighliegh, Mae's niece." Josh introduced us, but eyed his brother warily.

"Nice to meet you Kaighliegh." Jake grinned and stuck out his hand.

I smiled and shook it, wary of the mischievous glint in his eyes. "You too Jake." My reply was courteous, though I raised an eyebrow at Josh. He shrugged. Luckily for me though, we were next in line.

"Ladies first," Josh motioned when we were next.

I smiled at him. "Thank you."

I went through the routine with the bank teller, filling out the deposit slip and signing over the money. After receiving my receipt, I thanked the teller and headed for the door. I glanced around and saw that Josh had already been helped and left the bank. Slightly disappointed I didn't get to say bye, I walked outside to head back to the Elbow Room.

Outside I found Josh standing a few feet from the door, smoking a cigarette. Jake was nowhere to be found. I grinned when I saw him and walked toward him. He met me half way. "So what do you have going on today?" he asked me.

I couldn't stop the butterflies that instantly fluttered in my stomach from the question. I took a breath before answering. "I have to head back to the bar and wipe down tables and clean up a bit from last night. Then I'm helping Mae once we open."

Josh nodded. "Yeah, we have a bunch of clean up to do from the trip. And then we have to start getting the boat ready for the next one."

I nodded. I was slightly disappointed that he would be leaving again and so soon, but I knew he was a fisherman and had a job to do. Besides we just met, I didn't need to be jumping head first into some relationship, not that that was where it was going with Josh. I mentally sighed. I needed to stop.

"When do you leave again?" I asked, making conversation. I crossed my arms over chest and huddled slightly. In just my sweater, the breeze coming off the harbor was very chilly. I hadn't planned on standing around outside for very long.

Josh exhaled his drag of smoke and rubbed his head through his beanie. "Monday. We'll be gone another week."

I nodded. "You usually work through the week and then have the weekend off?"

"Nah," he shook his head. "The off load dates just keep falling on the weekends. We're looking at a lot of Friday dates this year. It's a little unusual, but I'll take it." His grin was infectious and I gave in and grinned in return.

"Well, I should probably get going. Mae is probably wondering where I am. We still have a lot to do before opening." I shuffled my feet as

He grinned, "Well then I better let you get back to work, I should probably head back myself too." I nodded and turned to walk away. "Maybe I'll see you later?" he asked me.

I smiled and shrugged, "I'll be at the bar."

He nodded, his grin still making stomach do flip flops. "Okay." We grinned and both turned and started walking away. When I was about twenty feet away, he called out to me. "Oh, and Kaighliegh?"

I turned and walked backwards watching him. "Yeah Josh?"

"You look very nice today." The corners of his eyes were crinkled and his smile dimpled; he looked completely adorable and it made my heart race.

I think I blushed ten shades of red as I smiled at him. "And you don't look so bad yourself Mr. Harris. I mean if you can get over the haven't-showered-in-a-week, fishermen thing." I quipped smiling, still walking slowly backwards.

His rumble of a laugh had my heart skipping a beat. I laughed with him and waved. "I'll stop by the bar later," he announced.

"Later," I agreed as I turned away from him again. I headed up the hill back toward the Elbow Room. I smiled and shook my head, thinking about Josh. He was suddenly the new highlight to look forward to that evening. I'm sure Mae would be pleased to hear of my recent run in with Josh Harris. She would probably even start planning something devious for later that evening. I sighed thinking about it. Maybe I shouldn't tell her about it after all...

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**Well that was chapter 4. As promised, Josh came back. I hope everyone liked it. I write and update sooner based on reviews. So hit that little green button and tell me what you think! HIT THAT GREEN BUTTON!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hello everyone, I know its been forever and day, but here's the new chapter!**

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Chapter 5.

When I got back to the bar, Mae was still in the office going through papers and organizing her desk. Her curly blonde hair was falling in to her eyes and she blew it out of the way absently. "Where do you want this?" I asked her, referring to the signed bank forms in my hand.

She looked up distracted and sighed, "Over on that chair."

I nodded and set the papers down, tossing my purse on the floor under the chair. Without waiting to be told I left Mae to the paper work and went to go wipe down the many tables in the bar room. I cut through the kitchen to the back closet where the janitor's closet was.

As I was filling a bucket with water and soap music starting blaring from the speakers in the ceiling, Mae had hit the power in her office. The sounds of heavy guitar riffs and deep pounding bass quickly covered the silence. And that was all it took for me to find my rhythm and forget about Josh for the next couple of hours.

The day passed by very quickly. I had the bar cleaned and sparkling in no time. The kitchen crew arrived shortly after I had started cleaning and the cook Mitch had made me the most delicious omelet for lunch. Soon day faded to night and the bar was bustling with fishermen in port for the weekend.

It was almost eleven o'clock when I heard the door chime for the millionth time that evening. I glanced up to see that it was Edgar Hansen, Engineer and Deck Boss on Northwestern, but for the summer he was Captain while they were tendering Herring. I had met him a couple days ago and we had become fast friends.

He waved to me as he headed over to his crew sitting in the corner. I returned the wave and glanced back at the door with a sigh. That was when Mae saddled up next to me. "Girl! You've been watchin that damn door all night! This wouldn't have anything to do with a certain boat bein back in town, now would it?" Mae smirked at me.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." I grinned and took the next customer that had just walked up.

"Uh huh. I'm sure." But she left it alone. I shook my head as she walked away, smiling slightly as I checked the door yet again. I was being pathetic and I knew it. But for some reason I couldn't help it.

"Are you even old enough to be tending a bar?" The voice broke me out of my thoughts and I jerked my head to the right to see Edgar leaning against the end of the bar. His smirk was playful and the glint in his eyes mischievous. His dirty blonde hair seemed to be always in some state of disarray and tonight was no exception. His usually clean goatee was almost lost in the few days' worth of stubble.

When I had first met him only a few days ago, he had come into the bar and had asked that very same question; though at the time he was serious. He had heard that I was new in town and had decided to take it upon himself to "make sure I was capable of handling such a high-stress-demanding-job."Direct quote, seriously.

I smirked in return. "Are you allowed to be away from the geriatrics ward for very long?" I quipped back. And it was that "on the spot quick thinking" he had told me that had let him know the bar would be in good hands.

Edgar chuckled and shook his head. "How're you doing tonight Kaighliegh?"

"I'm doing pretty great!" I grinned. And that was the truth. I felt like I was falling into place in my surroundings and it was slowly becoming home.

"Great huh? Yeah I guess you look great." He smirked and looked me over. My black hair was halfway up and as curly as ever. I wore a simple red sweater and jeans, nothing fancy. "But it's more like divine if I had a say."

"Uh huh," I smiled, "You don't have a say though. Not one that counts anyways."

He laughed and shrugged. "Hey now, I can look and compliment. There's just no touching." He wiggled his eyebrows up and down flirtatiously.

"Hansen, you keep your hands off my Niece!" Aunt Mae threatened, smiling broad. I hadn't noticed her walk over. "Fingers and toes too!" She pointed a finger and Edgar.

He laughed and held up his hands in surrender. "Now where's the fun in that?"

I rolled my eyes and shook my head. "What can I get you Edgar?"

He grinned at Mae as she walked past us to head on to the floor to make her rounds. I chuckled but kept my attention on him. "Oh just four beers," he said, moving to stand straight up. He arched his back, straightening it, while I nodded and turned away.

I grabbed four bottles of MGD, something I thought – Jake was it? – had ordered earlier that evening. When Edgar didn't correct me when I set them before him I assumed I had been right. "Thanks Kales," Edgar nodded and turned, walking away.

I shook my head while a smile on my face as I sighed. It was a quarter after eleven and there were still a couple more hours to go, but I was definitely ready for a break. I looked around the bar to see where Mae was, and took in how crowded it was. Friday night was definitely a lot busier than the rest of the week had been.

"Hey Kales, you want something to eat?" I heard a man shout from behind me.

I looked over my shoulder to see Mitch poking his head through window to the kitchen. As the only cook in the place, he was in charge of the kitchen and usually only had Mae to serve the tables. It was pretty simple. The customer ordered their food at the bar and Mae, or now me I guess, brought them their food. Being such a small town and fishing community where everyone knew everybody, it wasn't hard to serve the correct orders to the right customer.

"Yeah Mitch, I'm starved!"I moved closer to the window so I didn't have to shout to be heard.

Mitch was about ten years older than Mae at fifty-five and didn't act a day over eighteen on most days. He had salt and pepper hair, was almost six foot two, and only had a small beer paunch. His arms were tight and muscular and his grin never faded. "What can I get you Baby Girl?" he asked.

The moment he had met me he had told me that Aunt Mae's nickname for me was perfect, and he was adopting it. There was no questioning, there was no fuss, and it was just how it was going to be from then on out. But that was Mitch. There was no bullshit. It was refreshing.

"A chicken sandwich sounds good." I smiled and folded my arms on the window ledge.

He grinned and moved away from the window, heading toward the fridge. "Coming right up Baby Girl!"

I watched him work for a little bit before another patron caught my attention. With Mae still moving around the room, talking with fishermen and taking drink orders, it was up to me to man the bar.

I moved up and down the bar, filling and making drinks, grabbing beers and taking food orders. It wasn't until Mae tapped my shoulder that I looked up. She was holding my plate of food in one hand and a bottle of water in the other. "Oh damn, I forgot."

"Yeah, you've been concentrating." She smiled and handed them to me. "Go take a break in the office."

I took them and nodded gratefully. I took Mae's advice and went to her office, closing the door behind me. The sudden quiet was amazing, and I sighed in bliss as I sank into her office seat.

By the time I had finished eating Mae was walking in the room with a huge grin on her face. "Here, let me take those to Mitch to clean. You're needed at the bar."

I raised an eyebrow at her, while taking one last gulp of my water before wiping my mouth. Deciding to ignore her, I headed out of the room and back into the bar, carrying my almost empty water bottle with me.

Not seeing anyone immediately I glanced around, only to find Josh sitting at the far end of the bar, smiling at me expectantly. My grin was instantaneous, but I walked over slowly, taking my time. I glanced up at the clock as I grew closer. It was midnight by that time, and I had been in the back half an hour. Josh had an almost empty plate in front of him, with only a few fries left and empty bottle of MDG in his hand. I grabbed him a fresh bottle of beer and exchanged it with the empty one, dropping the bottle into the recycling bin at my feet. "Hey Kaighliegh," he grinned.

He looked tired. He wore a black beanie over his hair and a baggy navy sweatshirt. His voice was loud and enthused, but his eyes had dark circles under them and his eye lids looked minutes away from closing. "Hey Josh, how are you?" I asked taking another looked at him. Yeah, he looked exhausted.

"Pretty tired, not so hungry anymore though." He grinned again. "How are you? This place driving you nuts yet?"He gestured around the bar with his hand.

I laughed and shook my head. "No, not yet. They've been working you to the bone down there on that boat?"

His grin was easy, and though his eyes revealed just how tired he was, he shook his head in the negative. "Nah, it hasn't been that bad. We just had a lot of clean up to do today. The off load took a while longer than it should have and after we had to clean and reorganize the boat. And then we started getting it ready for when we leave tomorrow night."

I nodded, not sure how I felt about him leaving so soon again. I wasn't sure I should feel anything on the subject, but you can't always control how you feel. I wasn't really sure what to say. I barely knew the guy, saw him a handful of times, and he was leaving again.

Luckily for me, Josh changed the subject, "So would it be too forward of me to ask if you're seeing anyone?" his dimpled smile sent butterflies through my stomach, and though I felt it was too soon to start seeing anyone after Kevin passed, the possibility of Josh being interested was oddly endearing.

And damn him and his stupid smile too. He had me blushing with just a single simple question. He grinned wider, watching me squirm under his gaze. I shook my head, "No I don't think it's too forward. It's just a question."

He chuckled, "A question you're avoiding though." He pushed his empty plate forward, and leaned his elbows on the bar, leaning toward me. "So you either are dating someone and don't want to let me down, or you aren't dating anyone and don't want to let me down."

I sighed, shaking my head slightly, not sure on what to tell him. I think I had made it painfully obvious over our last few encounters that I was interested in him. I just hope I didn't hurt him while trying to figure out the mess that was my life.

"Josh..." I started to say, figuring I would just tell him the truth, about Kevin and about why I was there in the first place. Only, the other patrons of the bar wouldn't allow it.

"KALES!"Another fisherman, whose name I couldn't remember, shouted my name from the other end of the bar. I glanced at him and nodded, motioning with one finger that I'd be there in a moment. "Can we talk later, after we close?" I asked Josh.

He nodded slowly. "Yeah, that'd be good," he agreed.

"Are you sure? I know you're tired and it's getting late."

"Its fine Kaighliegh." He looked sure of himself as he nodded at me. I knew he was interested; he had made it as obvious as I had in our last encounter. I just hoped he could handle the truth when I told him.

I nodded and walked away, heading toward the deckhand whose name I suddenly remembered as Russell Newberry. He was a loud obnoxious guy that always liked to track me down and talk my ear off. I put up with him for Mae's sake, but if I had it my way, he'd be gone from the bar.

The night wore on, seemingly slower than the last hour and a half should have. Josh sat at the end of the bar, nursing a couple beers, and waiting patiently until we closed. By the time the last patron left and Mae locked the door, I was exhausted. Josh and I helped her close all the blinds before we all fell into chairs sighing. "Oh thank god," I groaned, pulling my feet up on the table.

Mae grinned. "Damn baby girl, those feet of yours stink!" she laughed.

I shook my head, grinning broadly. "Too bad you can't smell them through my shoes; maybe I should just do something about that."

She smirked and shook her head, "You better not!" She stood up and shook her head as she walked away. I smiled. She went into the office and closed the door. Suddenly I was alone with Josh and I had no idea what to say.

"I'm surprised you're still here," I said looking over at him. If he looked exhausted two hours ago, he was practically sleeping now.

He gave me a lazy smile, leaning forward and resting his elbows on the table, his chin landing on a fist. "I wanted to finish that conversation from earlier."

I blushed, unsure where to even start. I wasn't even sure what my feelings were myself, how the hell was I supposed to explain them to an almost stranger.

"Kaighliegh, if I'm making you uncomfortable, let me know. I'll back off if that's what you want." His eyes told nothing but the truth, and even the bags beneath them told me of his sincerity.

"Josh, I don't even know where to start," I sighed. I leaned back in my chair and ran my fingers through my hair. I tried so hard to form the words I needed to explain how I was feeling and what I was thinking, but I kept coming up with nothing.

I felt a warm hand grasp mine and it was all the encouragement I needed. "Two years ago, my boyfriend was killed in a car accident."

Josh gave a slight in take a breath and squeezed my hand, but remained quiet. "He was my best friend. We had been friends since second grade. He lived right next door to our house in Chicago. Sophomore year of college was when we decided to date. We took it slow, but I think part of me had always loved him. We dated for three years. Two days before graduation, he was killed by a drunk driver."

The tears had welled up in my eyes, but I managed to keep them at bay. I was already giving Josh a sob story; I didn't need to add to his misery with a sob fest. Unfortunately a few tears slipped past and down my cheek. I quickly wiped them, apologizing. "I'm sorry; I didn't mean to dump all of this on you. You barely know me."

"Hey, it's okay," he soothed, squeezing my hand. "And besides, I asked for it, didn't I?" His crooked grin made my heart melt and I found myself returning it.

"So I guess what I'm trying to say with all of this, is no, I'm not seeing anyone." It took all of that just answer a simple question. I really was demented sometimes.

Josh chuckled and nodded, "See, was that so hard?"

I actually laughed, and blushed too. It was starting to amaze me how easily he was able to make me do that. I shook my head and shrugged, "I guess not."

I hadn't realized I had still been holding his hand until he squeezed it again before letting it go; then I realized how much I missed his warmth. "Okay, now with that answered, here's a new question for you: Are you interested in getting dinner with me tomorrow night?"

With that one question a million butterflies erupted in my stomach. Yes or no? Would I be insulting Kevin's memory with accepting a date with someone I barely knew? What would everyone else think? What would Mae say? Was I even ready for a date with someone who wasn't Kevin? A thousand questions flashed through my brain in a blink of an eye.

Josh sensed my dismay and reached out and grabbed my hand again. "It's okay, we can take things slow, and it's just dinner."

"Just dinner." I repeated to myself mainly. I glanced down at the table, looking at our hands before looking back at Josh. His eyes were twinkling and he had a small smile on his face, but everything about him was calming to me.

"Okay." I nodded at him.

"Okay?" he doubled checked.

"Okay," I confirmed.

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**I know, I know. I only took forever and half to update this. I'm so sorry for that. I've gotten some inspiration with the season being back on, so hopefully this will continue. As usual please inform me of any gramatical or spelling errors you may come across, I'm always trying to improve on the structure.**

**And please please review! I love knowing what you guys think, especially since I haven't posted in so long! Like or disklike, let me know. Constructive critism is always welcomed. **


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